Thursday, 22 September 2011

Thought-provoking questions

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So...? Any answers???

                                                       
P.S : “A life lived in fear is a life half-lived.”
—Spanish proverb, in Baz Luhrmann’s movie Strictly Ballroom

Zithande (Love yourself)

Wednesday, 14 September 2011

My dream husband

'Where have all the perfect princes gone? Perhaps only tenth of them come to every generation? From an early age I have had a clear picture of my husband-to be.

My ideal husband is a well-groomed man and handsome man. He is a fair in complexion with short hair. He has twinkly brown eyes that glow when he smiles his dazzling smile. His body is slim and toned and not overly muscular. His skin is as soft as a baby's bottom. He has soft, caressing hands that become as soft as steel when he has to protect his loved ones. His short, clean nails are as white as ivory. He does not have to be taller than me, but he has to carry himself well.

More importantly than his appearance though, is his personality. My ideal husband believes in honesty, love, compassion and romance. He is someone I can trust with my life; he is like a light at the end of a tunnel. A sense of humor is essential to cheer me up when I feel isolated and dejected. He will wipe away my tears, calm me down and remain me how much he loves and appreciates me. The man may be a mouse in stature but be a lion in strength. He should fight his own battles and will not mind sacrificing his pride when he really has to. The godly man I am talking about will have patience like a fisher man. He realizes that real men do cry and that real strength comes from within. My dream husband is not afraid to show affection. He does not get his sense of worth from the money in his bank account.
Still, my dream husband is quick-witted and successful- perhaps the CEO of a company. A trust worthy husband, he remembers his values and does not discard his ethics at the door of success. He does not sign reports he knows are untrue, does not conceal. In the boardroom he shows discretion and the ability to compromise.
I considerate husband knows the needs the support of his parents, spouse, siblings and children. At home he can mend, cook and clean. He even knows his way around the supermarket aisles. He is generous, respectful and caring man that I can bring home to my parents. He is disciplined and obeys the first commandment with a promise: 'Honor your father and mother.’ He is a well-respected member of the community and he comes from a righteous family. He has a good name- like scripture says: his ‘name is like perfume poured out.’
We all consider ourselves to be princesses. It is worthwhile for a true princess to wait patiently for your prince to sweep you off your feet- to love you and cherish you, to make you feel pretty and praiseworthy.'
                                                                


This has got to be one of my favorite FAVOURITE things I have ever written. It was actually an essay which I wrote back in high school about my dream husband. As you can see the standards are pretty high,some things have changed though like the physical appearance cause I was actually describing someone LOL but most things have stayed the same. I wrote this article while I was at my best but over the years I have made mistakes. Does that mean I deserve less? NO! My past is irrelevant, that is the beauty of grace it makes life not fair.

Monday, 12 September 2011

Relationship deal breakers: the things we see but choose to ignore

So ‘I’ and I have been getting to know one another a lot for the past weeks and it has become official, we will not be entering into a relationship. There were just too many deal breakers. Deal breakers are those things which we all happen to come across but we choose to ignore because we hope that the positive will outweigh the not-so-positive. Deal breakers are those things that will make you hate yourself for dating someone or staying with them because you did know things could have been different if you didn't ignore them. They are actually a part of knowing yourself, I have them that is why I was able to stop myself from going into a wrong relationship. It is not really a list that I have; it is just characteristics that have become apparent over the years that I do not like. Everyone actually has them and they differ from individual to individual, some people have ridiculous deal breakers though like not dating someone because they don’t have a car, really now that is too shallow. We can’t critic someone based on where they are in their live, I say: LADIES BE THE CHEER LEADER OF YOUR MAN’S DREAM, he might surprise you in the future that is if he has any sense of ambition and the willingness to achieve his dreams. Or if they litter (which also drives me insane), but why break up with someone because they litter when you can just explain to him/her that you have major issues with it. I decided to write a couple of my own I am not going to get into the obvious like cheating, abusive, in a relationship with someone, controlling, lying omitting important information etc. nope, I am talking about things that make me cringe. I am also going to include a few of the deal breakers between myself and ‘I’ not all.
                                               
When will I declare myself out...           
1 If I have to go against, make it my vocation to show and say over and over what my boundaries are then clearly the guy doesn’t respect my values- DEAL BREAKER!

2 No passion in his life- DEAL BREAKER!

3 References to my body- TURN OFF! Like calling my behind an ‘ASS’.

4 If the following questions come up while I am getting to know a guy then it is a definite DEAL BREAKER, I call them pervert questions!
What color underwear are you wearing?
How do you kiss (you would be surprised)
What do you wear to bed?
What turns you on?

5 Religious difference- DEAL BREAKER! Apostle Paul is pretty clear on this one in 2 Corinthians 6:14

6 Negative and complaining A LOT- TURN OFF! Been there, done that, worn the T-shirt, not going back.

7  Lack of Hygiene- TURN OFF!

8  Disrespecting women in general- DEAL BREAKER!

9 If I find myself saying ‘it is okay’ too often when I know it really isn’t- DEAL BREAKER!

10 If he can’t manage his time or rather can’t make time for me-TURN OFF! If someone wants to be a part of your life, they will make the time.

11 If he wants to spend every second with me- TURN OFF! Get a life!

12 No respect for adults-DEAL BRAKER!
 

And those are my deal breakers, the things that will ensure that I sprint...

Friday, 9 September 2011

Leave your hurts in the sand

A story tells that two friends were walking through the desert. During some point of the journey they had an argument, and one friend slapped the other one in the face.

The one who got slapped was hurt, but without saying anything, wrote in the sand:
TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE.

They kept on walking until they found an oasis, where they decided to take a bath. The one who had been slapped got stuck in the mire and started drowning, but the friend saved him.

After he recovered from the near drowning, he wrote on a stone:
TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SAVED MY LIFE.

The friend who had slapped and saved his best friend asked him, “After I hurt you, you wrote in the sand and now, you write on a stone, why?”

The other friend replied “When someone hurts us we should write it down in sand where winds of forgiveness can erase it away. But, when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone where no wind can ever erase it.”

LEARN TO WRITE YOUR HURTS IN THE SAND AND TO CARVE YOUR BENEFITS IN STONE.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.

Do not value the things you have in your life. But value who you have in your life!

Author: Unknown

Cindy Saul loves inspiration!!!!!!!!!!

Faith confessions over my finances

Father in Jesus name, I thank you that I am anointed to prosper. My eyes are open to see creative ways to increase financially; my ears are open to hear the best deals and my heart is pure so that you can channel finances through me.


I am on the path of perpetual increase, as I enter into my wealthy place. Wealth and riches are in my place. I declare I am the righteousness of God. I SOW my seed for supernatural abundance and I live in daily expectation of increase.


Money comes to me; my nature attracts money. The fear of lack of has been broken and has no power over me. I hear my Father's voice. The voice of intimidation and limitation I choose not to follow. I am the LENDER and the borrower.


The wealth of the wicked is being transferred to me and I commit to establish the Kingdom of God in the Earth. I am ready to distribute and channel for God's work in the earth.
I thank you Father that daily you are loading me with benefits. I am anointed to prosper. I forget not Your Name for you have given me the Power to Prosper. Abundance is Your will for me because it pleases you when I prosper. I call increase, abundance and prosperity to come Now in Jesus Name and I will be ever increasing all the days of my life!!!!!!!


                        

I got this from one of my homecell members, adored it and had to post it!

Dating the Christian way

Recently I have been thinking a lot about dating again, sooner or later that time will come again when I will like a guy again and we will probably date but now the thing that has been boggling my mind is dating the Christian way, how does one date in such a way that it honors God? All along I have thought I have mastered God's plan for my life: I was to enjoy my singlehood, allow God to really consume me and truly allow him to be the center then when the time is right God would usher Mr. right into my life and he would be that guy that I would date the Christian way with. But today it finally hit me that I do not know as much as I thought I did.

Here is what’s happening now; I have been taking to this really nice guy that is involved at church who has already let me know that he does like me and even though I do like him as well I do not think that is a good enough reason to date someone so in the mean time we decided to get to know one another more. To be honest the fact that I am pondering so much about whether or not I should give us a chance does tell him that should not because I have always imagined that when I meet the one I would not be confused, like it says in confusing is not from God. Nonetheless I am still praying about this, I pray that God will shut down the walls if it is not his will, there is absolutely nothing good for my outside the will of God-that I know for sure!

Now back to the main point. I thought that by taking off two years from dating I had conquered the inevitable- the weakness of the flesh and have learnt enough in my singlehood but clearly I thought wrong. I need a million questions answered before I can get into a relationship, questions about boundaries, yes I know sex before marriage is a NO NO but then what limits should my guy and I set for ourselves as we decide to wait? I am told to be real and meet the guy half way- if I say no to sex I should at least be willing to kiss the guy- right wrong? Kissing always leads to more and more…. So what is a young Christian woman to do as she prepares herself for marriage? Well… that is what I plan to undertaking, finding out how to date the Christian way

Friday, 2 September 2011

Why I don't date for fun and why I do not think anyone else should not!!

Last year while staying late up on campus a friend of mine happened to mention that she wants a boyfriend on campus, the way she said it sounded like she just wanted to date for fun which got me thinking... we have really lost the purpose of dating! It seems like so many people date just to date and I am not excluding myself, although I have been single for almost two years now because I simply refuse 'just to date', I cannot say I have always been wise. I have also been in a relationship where I did not put too much thought into, I just knew that I liked the guy and went into the relationship with him but now I can say that I am a lot wiser (by God’s grace). This post is about why I would never date for fun and I why I think everyone else shouldn’t.


Dating just for fun causes unnecessary turmoil and heartbreak

Relationships can go so many unexpected directions and to be honest before you date someone you can say you are dating just for fun all you want but the minute you are in that relationship you will have little control over what your heart feels. Proverbs 4:23 says, "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." This scripture is so important; it tells us to GUARD OUR HEARTS, protect it, don’t let any Tom, Dick and Harry get a hold of it, keep it pure and in this case the best way to guard your heart is to avoid dating for fun. I do not believe God intended me to go around 'falling in love' with every cute guy that comes my way. I believe that there is one guy out there who I should marry and there are a lot of guys I shouldn't so why should I be interested in them if they're not the one? 

 
Be not deceived, Bad Company corrupts good character
I have made up my mind, I am not a Jesus fan, I am a Jesus follower. I seek to get God’s approval in all area of my life. It is important to me that if I get into a love relationship it glorifies God. I agree whole-heartedly with Apostle Paul when he says believers should not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. Look at it this way, hang out with spiritual losers and you will become a spiritual loser but WHOA, hang on this is not to say we should not have casual contact with unbelievers that is too extreme and definitely not what the bible teaches that would even be contradicting myself cause I do have unsaved friends and I love them to bits, they contribute to my awesome life. As harsh as it may sound thought having friends that are not born again has taught me that believers have nothing in common with unbelievers that is why we date should only date within the body of Christ. Date someone who understands God like you do. Date someone who understand what you go through… the good times….the tough times…the time of prayer… the times of rejoicing. Date someone that will help you grow in Christ, isn’t that the whole point? More of Christ? In fact I love how Maya Angelou puts it for the ladies, she says a women’s heart should to so hidden in Christ that a man has to seek Him just to find her.'. Going back to the heading, it so true just as the secret to dealing with peer pressure is to choose the right friends; the secrete to to having a relationship that will glorify God is to choose smart, date a man/women after God's own heart.

God's purity standards are high.
God asks us to save sex for the marriage bed (Hebrews 13:4). He also tells us to refrain from lustful thoughts (Matthew 5:28). These standards are easy to agree to when you're at a singles seminar at church or signing your pledge for purity note or a ladies conference but they are tough to stick to when your heart is fully engaged in a romantic relationship-TRUTH! Just ask the hundreds of Christian girls who suddenly found themselves pregnant. These aren't girls who don't love Jesus. They aren't girls who were not wishy-washy in their stand for purity. They are girls who got caught up in a romantic relationship too soon. The best way to guard your purity in the years before you are able to marry is to avoid unnecessary relationships all together in order to avoid romantic relationships all together.

 Timing is everything
I made a discovery about what the Song of Solomon says about time from another blog and found it so fitting for this topic/post, here we go:
Timing is everything.
Song of Solomon 2:7 says, "Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires."
Song of Solomon 3:5 says, "Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires."
Song of Solomon 8:4 says, "Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you: Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires."
What's up with the repetition? I think Solomon really wanted to make a point. The right person at the wrong wrong time is still the wrong person .

Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8 also tells us about time
"To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven.
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to reap that which is planted.
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to to mourn, and a time to dance.
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing.
A time to get and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace."


How do you know if the time is right? Wait to be released! If you find yourself having feelings for a guy/lady speak to your spiritual  leaders about it and have them tell you what do they think about the whole situation. They know you, they pray for you and they keep record of your spiritual progress so they will be able to tell you if you are ready for a relationship.They have been around for a long time so they will be able guide you in the right direction.

More important than your leaders is God, pray about it and ask God to shut down any door that he doesn't want you to enter. I have been doing this and it has been working out so well for me.