1. Chuck Norris wants to laugh he reads the guiness book of records.
2. Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
3. The Guinness Book of World Records is actually Chuck Norris' elementary school report card.
4. God said "Let there be light" and Chuck Norris said "Say please
5. Chuck Norris is God's original prototype for the Messiah, but he had to be recalled when the nails didn't work.
6. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird
7.Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
8.If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the hell down
9.They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take crap (couldn't type out the original word) from anybody.10. Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.
laughing not so soft......